Loss is something everyone hates to go through, because of this, February is an especially hard month for my family. Almost a year ago, my aunt passed away suddenly from bowel cancer that she didn’t know she had. One day she was ‘healthy’, 2 days later she was gone. The waves of shock that rippled through my entire family are still felt a year later. She was an incredible woman, who, without children of her own became a second mother to all of her nieces and nephews. I hope every single day, that she knows how much she was loved. I miss her so and, now with a baby of my own, am saddened by the fact that she’ll never meet my sweet girl.
Yesterday, for the first time in my adult life, I experienced the loss of a pet. My father called me mid-morning to tell me that he had to have one of our family dogs put down. I knew I loved Nicky, I knew he was a part of our family, but I was not prepared for the overwhelming grief that I am feeling. I have been dealing with it by reading tips here, http://www.pet-loss.net/ , and it has been helping me a bit. I’m trying to focus on the fact that he’s better off now, no longer suffering, but my selfish side just wants to be able to snuggle with him again, I want to be covered with stinky dog kisses. I can’t believe I’ll never feel them again from my boy.
It’s surprising to me that loss & grief, are actually felt with intensity whether it be for a human or a pet. My heart hurts, my family is grieving, we all need to be together. So, tomorrow I will drive an hour & a half to be with my family as we grieve the loss of our dog. He deserves to be remembered.
Now, I am, without a doubt, an overly emotional person. I’m soft-hearted, so loss really hits me harder than others. It hangs onto my heart, my soul, my every breath, and refuses to leave my mind for a long time. I often hope that maybe one day I’ll be able to handle these things better, but I know that feeling them deeply is an essential part of the person I am. I’m proud of that, only because it means I really care about people. It means that at some point in my life, I loved someone & was loved in return. You can’t beat that.
‘For death is no more than a turning of us over from time to eternity.’ –William Penn.
* Note by Sally, this was Paulas test blog, Boo and myself found it so touching we wanted her to share it with all our lovely readers on Sc. Welcome to the team Paula.
I totally know how you feel. I lost my dog Mitsy 7 years ago. I had her before our first child. They grew up together and through cancer, she died at home with her family around her. I didn’t know loosing a dog could hurt so much. I felt like I had lost a child – well, I guess she was like a child. I still miss her to this day. We got another dog but she certainly is not Mitsy. Mitsy is buried in our back yard. My mother in law painted her portrait on a flat stone and that is her head stone. I am a nurse and have worked in Palliative care and have dealt with death many times in my career. I can honestly say, I have shed a tear for every patient I have lost. I don’t see this as a weakness but a stregth as it shows I am human and I care.
What a beautifully written piece. Thank you for sharing your heart with us.
sorry for your loss…
So so sorry for your loss :O( R.I.P Nicky
I am so very sorry for this devastating loss. 🙁
I’m sorry about your loss, thanks for sharing! Sending you a huge hug!
Sorry for your losses, although we are quite different (I tend to have a hard shell when it comes to emotions), I still understand what you are going through. I still dream of my dog who passed away more than 15 years ago. I awake occasionally remembering all the wonderful adventures and love we shared knowing that she is still in my heart. Tasha will never be forgotten and neither will Nicky, and in that way they are immortal to us.
Sorry for your losses, which unfortunately is a part of life.
I’m the last of my family at 50. Everyone else including my siblings is
gone.
If anyone needs a listening ear, just send me a Private Message.
I know,I feel,I hurt too.
Sorry for your losses.
Today, 18 years ago I lost my Dad and still miss him dearly today, I can still remember the sound of his voice. Today I lost a very good friend to prostate cancer, he had put up a courageous fight for the last 14 months. Angels among us.
Very sorry for your losses. Today, 18 years ago I lost my Dad and I miss him dearly. After 18 years I still remember the sound of his voice.
Today I lost a very dear friend to prostate cancer, he was only 50 years old. He fought a courageous battle for 14 months. I am so glad he stopped by last August to have me sign his pension papers and chat awhile. He was always the life of the party. I am going to miss him.
Always remember they are Angels among us!
Sorry for your loss. I was crying as I read your article as we have a 12 year old dog and we know that the future is now. Pets love so unconditionally-how could you not.
I am so sorry for your loss.I understand you and everything your saying. I am alot like you………….But know the certainties in life are death and taxes, Try doing your family tree, you will see and understand and may come to more acceptance of what nature offers.
Sorry for the loss of your dear pet! My sister had to put down their dog last week due to diabetes & her hubby’s uncle & grandfather also passed all in the same week…so sad to lose a member of the family but 3 in a week is crazy!
Today marks the 3rd Anniversary of our grandmothers passing too!
Its hard to deal with the loss but always hold the good memories close to your heart!
I am very sorry for your loss, and I understand your feelings. I am a pet lover also, and we lost our beloved dog Katie just this past Aug 26th. She died completely unexpectedly here at home. My husband had just left for work, and when I went to visit her 20 min later, she had died. The vet had no explanation, and we never got to say goodbye to her, so it was that much harder trying to get over her dying, even though we will never get completely over losing her. Just try to remember all the good times you had, and over time the pain will lessen, just a little bit at a time.
So sorry about your loss; thanks for sharing your story.
So sorry for your loss.I to have a very soft and kind heart.I will tell you of my experience and I am sure this will help you and others.My Dad died a little over ten years ago at 72.I did not see a grey hair in his head although he had many.I was in denial and thought he would never die and it never entered my mind I would lose him. My Dad was a strict man and until I had children of my own I did not appreciate how much love was put into the raising of his children.I went through the grieving process has you would expect anyone would and I thought to myself the day he was to be buried would be the last day we would see him and I did not know how to get through it.I keep my emotions in check for the most part.My husband and I sat quietly in the car outside the church waiting for the rest of the family to arrive for the service.Has I sat there I felt a overwhelming sense of peace come over me like I had never felt before. I felt my fathers presence and it was so comforting that words could not express it.I said to my husband – Dad is here with me.It was truly the most amazing feeling.I call it my fathers gift.I went in the church and sang every hymn for my father and did not shed a tear.I have a really bad back and through the full service I was fine.There are more bits and pieces to it but I have told you the most important part.Since that day I know there is more to death then we know and it is nothing to be afraid of.It is not the end and this life is only a small part of our being here so do not cry and mourn for your family and pets. Rejoice that you had them to love for the time you had because they are okay and are truly at peace.I miss my Dad and I do cry at times but the tears are for me that he is absent from my life.I know without a doubt he is fine and so are your family and your pets to.My Dad was a caring kind man to and I am so proud when people say -You are just like your father.God Bless you all.
I’m so sorry for your loss. I completely understand where you are coming from. I too have a very soft heart when it comes to my furbabies, as I call them. I have been where you are and no matter how much you think you are prepared for the passing of a pet it still breaks your heart when it happens. I have no children and my girl was like a child to me. I too felt overwhelmed by the grief I felt. She was 12 yrs old so I knew it was coming but still it was a shock the day she died in my arms. She is burried in the backyard in my garden. She has a marker with a plaque with her picture etched into it along with a poem just for her. I have 2 other girls now and they so a part of me and my life. Pets are family and when we lose family it hurts. I can compare as I lost my dad 4 yrs ago to cancer as well and I cried over both and they both hurt. Sending a big hug your way.
Sorry to hear about your losses. Thanks for sharing. Sending prayers and hugs your way.
I put down my cat, Mr Buddles, yesterday. he had a respirtory illness. I didn’t find that out until yesterday and my vet told me he had a week to live. My heart is broken, i am so lost right now. Getting this email about the Pet Loss site was a blessing becuase i read it and it’s help see through the cloudiness a bit. Thank you for posting about this and giving me comfort that others care so deeply about their pets.
Sorry to hear about your losses, all of you who poted here. My heart goes out to you all.
thanks
So sorry for your loss. On November 11th 2010 we also lost our first “real” family pet, our golden retriever/lab Daisy, who’d been with us for 16 years. It was really sad for all of us. It still makes me sad knowing, that I’ll never see her crazy jumps and beggings to throw a stick or rock for her, ever again.
I’m also very sorry to hear about your aunt – that has to be terrible, as you couldn’t even prepare for it. 🙁
So sorry for your losses.
I was diagnosed with bowel cancer 15 years ago. I still remember how scared I was that I would die.Even though your aunt passed away so suddenly, at least she didn’t have to suffer through chemo, radiation, surgery, etc.
We have lost a few pets through the years and it never gets easier.
I, myself, believe that our family AND our pets are waiting for us to join them when our time comes.Whether it’s heaven or the cosmic universe; we’ll all be together one day. But, gosh darn it, it doesn’t make things easier right now, does it?
My prayers and good wishes are with you.
http://www.ovc.uoguelph.ca/petloss/
OVC Pet Loss Support Hotline
Listening is the best medicine
“Our animals shepherd us through certain eras of our lives. When we are ready to turn the corner and make it on our own…they let us go.”
–author unknown
Please call us at: 519-824-4120 x53694
Who we are:
We are a group of University of Guelph students who are trained to listen and support you through your grief.
We provide a non-judgmental forum in which you can express your feelings and concerns surrounding the loss of your pet.
We are a resource you can use for information regarding pet loss, euthanasia and the memoralization of your pet.
We are not licensed veterinarians or counselors and as such we cannot give you medical advice or provide crisis intervention.
Please call:
Tuesday – Thursday
6:00 pm -9:00 pm ET
519-824-4120 x53694
Hi Nadial God Bless you.You are very brave.I hope you are well.you are right with thinking they are waiting for us because my experience with my Dad let me know without a doubt there is more to it then we will ever know but you are right it is very hard to go through that is why sites like this let us talk and relate to each other and just knowing there are people out there like ourselves helps a lot. We had a little Benji dog for 16 years.He died of old age and we knew we would lose him so we prepared. We had a little box built by my husband and son.We buried him on family land and wrapped him in the first blanket our first born son had received when he was born.This may seem silly to other people but when he died we sang nearer my god to thee.You know all this helps so much and when you find yourself feeling sad remember it is only sad thoughts and the fun and love you had with all of them family and pets are just the best and it was truly an honor to have them for just that little while.We are so lucky. Suzanne You are so right.There are angels among us. So wonderfully said.