Wedding Season is in high gear and you know what that means, yet another opportunity to offend people! (Much like the above Wedding Uggs. Blech.) For the most part, I’d like to think that offending people isn’t done on-purpose, but without curling up to Emily Post, aren’t some things just common sense??
Example #1: Many years ago, I had recently developed a new friendship with a newly-engaged couple who invited me to their Engagement Party…in Montreal. We had a whole bunch of friends in-common who they also invited, so a bunch of us piled into a car for the 6-hour road trip/Engagement Party.
Faux-pas? I was never invited to the actual wedding. 🙁 Fix? Be intentional with your invite list. Don’t invite people to one event and exclude them to another.
Example #2: I’ve been invited to a couple of nuptials where, “Couple requests cash-only” appears on the invite. <– Major faux-pas in my eyes! You & your future spouse might be settled in because you’ve been living with each other for a while and currently need cash to make the mortgage payment, but how utterly tacky is it to mention “cash-only” on an INVITE??!! Not only is it tacky, but it just leaves a terrible impression on your guests. 🙁
Example #3: Recently, I received an invite, in the mail, in which my name only appeared on the envelope. My bf’s name had been excluded. (The Bride is a high school friend of mine and we have the same circle of friends who see each other a handful of times a year.) Anyway, upon urging of a friend-in-common, I emailed the Bride to ask her whether or not I could bring my partner…of 6 years.
Bride responded, “Yes of course he’s invited! My fiancé was in a mad rush getting the invites out and forgot to put partners’ names on the envelopes, so tons of people have been emailing me!”
Fix? We all get busy, but it’s your special day. Invites are important and shouldn’t be an afterthought. So the more Type-A one should be like Santa Claus, making the list and checking it twice…thrice even!
Example #4: Same wedding as #3. One of our friends-in-common never received an invite. So I’m not sure if this was done on-purpose OR if it the invite was overlooked in the fiancé’s hastiness.
Fix? In my response to the Bride, I also mentioned, “Hey, so-and-so hasn’t received her invite. Not sure if she wasn’t invited, so I just wanted to let you know!”. Hopefully, that’ll resolve the issue and there won’t be any hurt feelings.
Maybe I’m just weird to be miffed about these details and not affected by others, re: evite invitations. Sure, they scream cheap, non-traditional, but honestly, those expensive pieces of paper containing crucial info for that one-night goes directly into the garbage pail after the whole ordeal is over anyway!
As with any major event that includes endless amount of details, SOMETHING is bound to be overlooked. However, if as the planner, you try not to cut corners especially where the invitations are concerned, hopefully you’ll manage to avoid offending people, on-purpose or not!